The Fledgling Journey

Navigating a Good Life One New Experience at a Time

Page 2 of 13

Do things happen for a reason?

Some people  think things happen for a reason. Many people have religious or spiritual beliefs that encompass this concept. Not that life is pre-destined, but that there is a master creator with a plan that’s larger than you. You might be called to do something or not to do something for a reason that’s part of this higher being’s plan. I’m not religious, but I believe that things happen the way they do for a reason. It’s comforting to think that there is an order or logic to the way life unfolds, even if you can’t see it in the moment.

I was talking to a co-worker today, who mentioned that she believes life happens for a reason, but not a reason that’s ahead of you. You are a domino being pushed by the dominos behind you. Your past life experiences are shaping you and pushing you today and that is the only logic and order in the world.

I told her about some of the thoughts running through my mind now, for example, I think I want to have kids, but it’s also  something that isn’t completely within my control. Maybe I haven’t met someone and had children because I’m supposed to do something else right now or in the future. She said that instead, my past decisions and actions have put me where I am and now I have to make decisions based on what information I have. I can’t make decisions based on what could be, but only what is concrete right now.

It’s an interesting thought and maybe it doesn’t have to be one way or the other. Maybe it’s a combination of past and future, all culminating in what I’m experiencing right now. That’s all for now. Happy Monday 🙂

Friday Favorites

Linking up again for Friday Favorites. This weekend I am spending some times with friends, going to a volunteer orientation, having a writing date, and seeing the new Blade Runner. It has gotten off to a rocky start because I did not feel well at all yesterday, but today…so far, so good 🙂

ONE

Bliss gloves. Have you guys tried these? I have skin issues on my hands and these are moisturizing them well.  They’re expensive, but you can sometimes find them on Rue La La or Hautelook for a better price. They’ll be helpful as the air gets drier.

TWO

I randomly stumbled on KEEP Collective on Instagram and I’m excited to get my first bracelet.

THREE

My mom is making nutella filled pancakes this weekend. My love of Nutella started when I was studying abroad in London and has not tapered at all.

FOUR

I ordered these pajamas from BedHead PJs on Amazon. I mostly wear sweats to bed, but I would like to upgrade. Little pleasures add up 🙂 I was inspired after watching New Girl and The Mindy Project because they wear really cute pajamas.

FIVE

I also treated myself to two new nail polishes, OPI Black Onyx and Black Berry Chutney. I thought I had Butter London Union Jack Black, but somehow can’t find it.

SIX

New embroidery project. I’m pretty excited about this new design.

SEVEN

I’ve been a little stressed lately, which has led to some unhealthy stress eating (a lifelong habit I’m trying to kick) but the process of rewiring my brain to turn to different coping mechanisms is a work in progress. At any rate, I have tried to wake up early and go for a very short jog. I literally go 10 blocks, but I figure it’s a good starting point.

Wishing you a great weekend!

Some of My most Embarrassing Dates

I’m not proud to admit it, but I’ve been on my fair share of dates. Some were good, some were bad, and some were totally neutral. And then a few have been really awkward.

There was one date with a guy who turned out to have very long hair and work as a film projectionist with no further career aspirations. I’m coming off as pretty judgmental here, but he was fiercely boring in multiple ways.  He told me he didn’t like to travel and preferred to stay at home. Hard pass. I still go to that movie theater and wonder if I’ll run into him. Hasn’t happened yet.

I once went on a date with a guy who was cool and attractive but because he was sitting there all cool and attractive, he made me nervous. He asked me about my favorite movies and I was trying to sound really smart, so I said I liked Hitchcock films. He asked which ones and I proceeded to forget every Hitchcock movie I knew and all of their plots. And then I apologized and it got really awkward. I got the hell out of there as fast as I could.

One time I had a second date with a guy where I fell down the stairs at a bar. I’d only had one drink, but this bar had glossy hardwood stairs and it was raining outside. I think everyone there thought I was wasted but I definitely wasn’t! I had dark bruises on the back of my legs and arms for at least two weeks. It was painfully embarrassing. Literally.

Another time I was waiting for a haircut at one of those walk-in hair cutting places. This guy sat down next to me and tried to start a conversation with me about the book I was reading. I crashed and burned. Partly because I couldn’t hear him and partly because I’m just awkward AF. It was cringe worthy.

There was a second date with this guy at the Greenlake Bar and Grill where I ran into the guy I had broken up with a few weeks earlier. I mean we didn’t say anything to each other but I definitely saw him and he saw me. It was uncomfortable to say the least. I didn’t really want to point out my ex to the guy I was getting to know, but I was definitely flustered and in my head. I was tense but trying to pretend I was relaxed. Pretending to be relaxed is really intense. I don’t recommend it. That was the last date with that guy.

Dating is rough. On top of that I’m quiet and hard to get to know. I take a while to open up and I’ve been told I’m hard to read. I think I probably don’t seem particularly interesting until you get to know me. Introvert problems. At any rate, I go through phases where I enjoy dating and phases where I want nothing to do with it. I think that’s normal-ish? Maybe someday some guy will make it worth all the fuss and heartbreak and ups and downs, but until then, I’m just doing the best I create a life that can keep me content.

Have an enjoyable Thursday 🙂

Working on it Wednesday

I have a 30×30 31×31 goal/bucket/project list that I’m chipping away at – 31+ things to accomplish by the time I turn 31. I had previously ignored it for months and finally realized I need to plan ahead if these are truly things I want to do. I’m checking in on Wednesdays, which is helping me keep track of my progress and keeping me accountable.

September Project Recap

Completed

  • Finish The Catcher and the Rye
  • Watch a few AFI Top 100 Movies
  • Try a Skillshare class
  • Try a yoga app
  • Do 5 year journal pages for September
  • List 4 items on Poshmark/Ebay
  • Check for Ellen show tickets
  • Continue working on crossword puzzles
  • Research learning stick shift

Partially Completed

  • Read Mansfield Park
  • Update travel pages for Banff, Switzerland, and Greece trips
  • Find a writing group/partner (scheduled, writing date with a friend)

Not Completed

  • Make 3 items for Etsy shop <–don’t think I made any. Got a little overwhelmed.
  • Create an urban hike <–the weather has turned so I’m bumping this for now
  • Improve SEO <–not excited about this, but should do it
  • Learn to make a classic cocktail <–I got side tracked. Will do next month
  • Make or try one of the Zagat 50 state sandwiches <–These aren’t floating my boat now. I’m bumping it
  • Don’t complain for 4 days <–Oops. Didn’t do it. Maybe I should start with just 1 day
  • Finish up retirement account rollover etc.  <–I hate this but need this reminder!
  • Try a new food truck <–I’m also trying to save money, which is goal that conflicts with dining out. Food trucks aren’t crazy expensive but this just doesn’t feel like a priority now. I think I’ll keep this in mind for those times when I want to go out and want something different. Maybe I should keep a list of Seattle food & drink spots to try…

October Projects

    1. Finish Mansfield Park
    2. Watch an AFI Top 100 Movie
    3. Continue reading Lord of the Rings
    4. Learn to make another classic cocktail
    5. Try a new Skillshare class
    6. Update blog travel for Switzerland
    7. Develop an app idea and consider putting on freelancer
    8. Do 5 year journal entries for month of October
    9. Make 3 items for Etsy shop
    10. Buy a new DSLR camera? <–the cost makes me cringe
    11. Research WA cottage food laws
    12. Improve SEO 
    13. Promote blog on Pinterest
    14. Create a Seattle food & drink spots to try list
    15. Don’t complain for 1 day
    16. Finish up retirement account rollover
    17. Work on podcast ideas
    18. Word on dad’s birthday present

The items on this list are ideas and jumping off points, not necessarily requirements. I usually need to remind myself that they are optional because somehow it makes them easier to do.

What worked: The Jerry Seinfeld Streak Method

I read that Jerry Seinfeld decided the best way to write better jokes was to write everyday. He put a big calendar on his wall and crossed off each day he wrote. His idea was that seeing a sequence would make him more likely to do something because he didn’t want to break the good pattern. I like the quote from the article I hyperlinked: “small improvements accumulate into large improvements rapidly because daily action provides ‘compounding interest.'” I started using this method for my four mini habits – cardio exercise, weight lifting, reading a classic novel, and writing fiction. It doesn’t matter how long I do any of them, it could be just reading a page or doing 10 reps. Stupid small. The hope is that it’s so easy that once I get started I keep going because it isn’t that hard, but it fights that internal resistance of just getting started. There have been some bumps with this method, but I like the feeling of checking off what I’ve accomplished. It makes it harder to blow any one habit off.  You can see the photo below – a check means I did it and a frown means I didn’t.

The calendar isn’t cute, but it gets the job done.

That’s it for now. Warm wishes to you on this Wednesday 🙂

You Can’t Edit a Blank Page

I read a Jodi Picoult quote recently that said “You might not write well everyday, but you can always edit a bad page. You can’t edit a blank page.” Wise words. To keep myself accountable I’m going to try to publish something creative (and small) on Mondays.

The thing about being a barista is that nobody is just a barista. They’re in school, they’re
a musician/actress/dance teacher, they’re between jobs, or they’re finding themselves
after shelling out nearly $80,000 for a degree they aren’t using. Baristas are usually pretty good workers, but always half-heartedly invested. I’ve had a love/hate relationship with this job since about 2 weeks after starting. It’s fast paced, the tips are good, and there’s a free drink of choice with every shift. But that’s where the positives ended. Most days are  dull, but every once in a while something offbeat happens. We have to find the humor in a customer’s complaint about their bone-dry venti cappuccino not being dry enough, or our manager’s overly peppy attitude. We try to guess what she is like under-caffeinated. Maybe time will tell. What made today particularly interesting was when Jeremy, my regular 10:15 customer, slid a dollar tip across the counter toward me, folded as an origami elephant. He walked out the door with his tall drip coffee in hand and didn’t look back. I quietly put the one in the pocket of my apron because he’d slid it past the tip jar toward me with a straight face. No smile. No flirtation. It was completely perplexing in the best way possible.

 

Comments are welcome. Happy Monday 🙂

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